These are self defeating patterns of thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that keep us stuck. We often fall into these traps consciously or unconsciously and they end up having a lasting negative impact on our lives. We will be exploring 10 traps to avoid in life. Once you have Knowledge of what these traps are, you will be able to make more informed decisions to avoid them.
1. Approval Seeking
Trying to please everyone before making a decision will always lead to wrong decisions. Seeking approval from everyone including strangers is a big trap which must be avoided in life. You may be afraid to do things your own way, because you are afraid of being accused or criticized. It’s not too late to stop seeking other people’s approval in everything you do. However, you should seek advice from trustworthy people in your life such as your parents, siblings, mentors or close friends.
This is a trap which we have to strive as much as possible to avoid in life. Entitled people are very demanding and controlling toward others, and always want things done their own way. Entitlement will end up causing you so much trouble in life. It can lead to conflicts in relationships, unhappiness, disappointment and depression.
Pessimists pay more attention to negative than positive things in life. They worry about the future and find it hard to accept that things can go well as planned. If something good happens they always expect that something bad is going to happen next. According to verywellmind , pessimists tend to focus on their flaws or weaknesses rather than their strengths and often feel annoyed by other people's optimism. Be an optimist and a realist.
4. Insufficient Self-control
If you have difficulties controlling your emotions and your mind and do not always think about the consequences of your actions, you will end up getting in trouble. Lack of boundaries can easily lead to addictions: drinking, smoking, excessive eating, , internet addiction or other problematic behaviors. Not every feeling or desire of yours must be satisfied. Exercise self control.
5. Social Isolation
This is when you feel anxious in social situations and it makes you to avoid them. You feel uncomfortable and nervous when you meet new people and you do not really know what to say. Reports from the Center for disease control and prevention say that Social isolation significantly increases the risk of premature death. It also leads to a 50% percent increase in the risk of getting dementia.
6. Playing the Victim
It is the fabrication or exaggeration of victimhood for a variety of reasons such as to justify abuse to others, to manipulate others, a coping strategy, attention seeking or diffusion of responsibility. If you want to stop playing the victim, you need to accept reality rather than fight it. You should learn to stop blaming others and stop waiting for others to fix your problems.
7. Seeking Revenge
Revenge is like drinking poison yourself and expecting someone else to die. According to a report from the New York Times , seeking revenge or payback may seem like a good idea at the time, but in the long run it’ll likely only do us a disservice. The better option is to turn inward, find the root of that feeling and use it as a learning experience.
It’s natural to feel bitter or develop a grudge when you are hurt by someone. As bitterness builds inside of you, it’s usually followed by a swarm of other emotions—feelings of anger, resentment and rejection accompanied by a desire for revenge. Toxic emotions don’t change your situation or the person that hurt you. To overcome bitterness, you have to let go of grudges, forgive and understand that bitterness and resentment will destroy you.
9. Self Centeredness
We all need to take care of ourselves, but there’s an appropriate amount of self-interest, self-preservation, and self-attention. Self-centeredness is a trap which makes people feel threatened, vulnerable, and anxiously insecure with others. Self-centeredness will push people away from you.
Worries, doubts, and anxieties are a normal part of life. However, constant worrying, negative thoughts, and always expecting the worst can take a toll on emotional and physical health. You can’t control everything and worrying won’t change anything. Rather focus on what you can change.
Now you know about the traps to avoid in life. We hope you were inspired by this piece. Feel free to share any additional traps to avoid in the comments. Don’t forget to SUBSCRIBE to our blog. Thank you for reading and until next time, BESTech remains your best bet.